Peachfuzz Translations

Yume de Aimashou: Assistant (Itoi)

 

Yume de Aimashou: Assistant (Itoi)

from Yume de Aimashou, collected here

Assistant

    An assistant may not, without permission, eat a manjū which the professor has kept to eat at their leisure later on.
    An assistant may not scheme to prevent a lady visitor, on the pretext of said visitor’s beauty, from entering the professor’s office.

    An assistant may not practice such discrimination as to pour watery, worn-out tea for the professor, then give themselves the first pour of a new kettle.
    An assistant may not, when speaking with the professor, begin their sentences with “So, y’know…”
    An assistant may not covet a salary greater, nor chair more comfortable, than that of the professor.
    An assistant may not arbitrarily print “section chief” or other such titles on business cards.
    This being the case, I have no intention of becoming an assistant, now or anytime in the future.

--Itoi Shigesato
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    Jackson Pietsch
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